Wednesday, December 18, 2013

Dear Woman: Twerk Sumtin:The Role We Play In The Degradation of Women

Dear Woman,

I will start with this disclaimer: this is not going to be a popular post. That’s okay; I’m here to share Jesus not win the popularity contest for the year. Secondly, I created this section just for women so I can be blunt and to the point and really talk to the ladies. Before I start I will put my own business out there. Before I was saved and after I so called got saved and was going to church, I got it in at the club. I’m a very tiny little lady and therefore my motto was the shorter the tighter the dress the better so I could show off what little “assets” I have.  I thought it was “cute” to get attention from men because I was dressed like a hooker pretty much. I was team cut outs, sheer, short, tight, boobs up and out, and all that. Then I would get mad because I’m up in the club and these random guys are trying to feel up on me or grabbing my butt. I would get an attitude about the “cat calls” as I’m walking down the street with my friends freezing cold at 1, 2, 3:00 in the morning dressed scantily clad leaving from the club. I would get upset that men would make vulgar comments to me and felt it was okay to say they wanted to have sex with me.

Let’s be clear, I am not saying that it is ever okay for a man to rape or disrespect a woman because of the way that she is dressed or acting. I’m definitely not saying that at all and I don’t want what I’m going to say to seem as though I think that’s okay because it’s not. However, even with that being said, we as women have to think about the way that we carry ourselves and the image that we are portraying. I remember watching something on TV years ago and someone was complaining about how men are degrading women in music videos as they are in little to no clothing and they’re twerking with all their goods exposed. They talk about how men are degrading these women but the unfortunate reality is that these women are okay with their behavior. They don’t feel like they’re being degraded and they’re perfectly fine showing off what they consider their best assets.  So now other women, especially younger women, look on and see the reaction from men and they think that they have to dress this way or dance this way to be attractive to men. Let’s be honest with ourselves ladies, what type of men are you trying to attract? Is it a man of God? I mean a true man of God, not a man who goes to church on Sundays and that’s the extent of his relationship with God. Now what type of image do you think you are portraying when you’re bent over in front of a man twerking? Women will say they want a true man of God but the way they dress, talk, dance, and act gives off the impression that they’re more interested in a “good time” than having a relationship with God. Then as women we wonder why we keep running into these men who just want to smash instead of pray or go to church with us. If I can be honest ladies, a true man of God is praying against that type of woman. A true man of God who is sincerely trying to pursue a relationship with Christ is not going to yoke himself up with a woman who tempts him with the way she dresses or her behavior. Real talk, that man is rebuking women like that, serious face. Furthermore, I can guarantee you 150% that you will indeed NOT meet a true man of God in the club so don’t get excited because old boy posted up on the wall says he’s a Christian. Christians have no business in anybody’s club point, blank, and the period.

We don’t want men to just want to have sex with us but so many women put all their goods on display or better yet they’re dry humping men on the dance floor. But as women we want men to respect us; we want them to honor our purity…Ladies the respect game has to start with you. You have to care enough about your body first to respect yourself before expecting anyone else to do so. Women of God, we don’t want that kind of attention. We want to attract people with our hearts for Jesus and our inner beauty and meek and quiet spirit (1 Peter 3:4). You have to set the standard for how people treat you. If you don’t set the standard someone else will come along and define it for you. No ma’am! The Holy Bible is the standard that we set for ourselves not a man made standard.

In 1 Corinthians 6:19-20 we’re asked a question, “Do you not know that your bodies are temples of the Holy Spirit, who is in you, whom you have received from God?” What are you doing with the temple that God has given you? The body that the Holy Spirit dwells inside, or should dwell inside, that you have received from God, how are you using it to honor God? Would you twerk in front of God? I know you’re thinking Angel that’s crazy! Are you for real right now? The thing is God is always watching us. We act as though we think that He isn’t because we can’t see Him but that does not mean that He is not watching us. So of course people would say no! I wouldn’t twerk in front of God if I could visibly see Him. He’s always watching. He’s looking down at His women and it breaks His heart to think that they don’t respect the temple that He has given them and that they don’t value themselves enough to honor their bodies. It goes on to say going into verse 20, “You are not your own; you were bought at a price. Therefore honor God with your bodies” (KJV). Ladies, no man has paid that price for you; no one but Jesus. Honoring God with your body is more than just abstaining from sex until you’re married. So people say, “I’m not having sex with these men, I’m just dancing geez!” or “I just want to look cute in my little outfit!”  First Thessalonians 5:22 tells us to “abstain from all appearance of evil” (KJV). How can we effectively share Christ if we don’t reflect Christ but we look exactly like the world? Just because you aren’t doing it it’s like it doesn’t even matter because from the outside looking in you look like the world. if people can’t tell that you are following Christ based off of your lifestyle something’s not right. As women of God we’re called to dress modestly (1 Timothy 2:9) not flaunt all of our curves because God gave us a little body ody. Dear woman, you are worth being respected. Your value and your worth is found in Christ and not how big your butt looks in your dress, how well you can dance, or anything else. It’s in Christ. Let’s honor Him with our bodies in all that we do and be intentional about giving Him our entire hearts.

Love you ladies,


P.S. Don't forget to check out the new Changed Hearts: I AM Woman site that can be accessed through!

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